Scott is the love of my life, my fiance, and probably the most amazing man on the face of the earth. And while most of you know who I'm talking about, I still feel the need to protect the innocent, which clearly does not include me. And in case you didn't connect the dots, dear readers, (of whom there are none), I will soon cease to carry the
But I digress.
The following is a mostly true recounting of an actual text between the the two of us:
me: 911!!!
s: what?! are you OK honey??do i need to come get you??
me: no, maybe, I don't know.. I'm in trouble and i need your advice
s: of course honey, what is it?
me: courtesy flush or fecal mist? seriously, i don't know what to do!!
long pause........
s: seriously honey? this is what you used the 911 text for??
me: YES! what else would i use it for?
s. oh i don't know, maybe an actual emergency??
me: i don't think you understand. i could either hide here in this stall and die of embarrassment or i could do my neighbor a solid (no pun intended) and courtesy flush, which would then leave me vulnerable to a number of diseases including but not limited to the hantavirus!!
Another long pause
s: honey, first of all, hantavirus is from rodents, not people. second, you actually pulled me out of a full mouth extraction after i FINALLY got to do a surgery with Dr. Anderson... for this?
me: clearly you've NEVER been in this situation.
And thankfully most of the conversation ended there, but seriously, this is a real concern!And while maybe it didn't all go down quite that way, you get the idea.
